Blue Nettles

The big question left over from last week is - did Larry pay to fly First Class on his return trip or did he settle for the small coach seats like the rest of us?

Inquiring minds want to know!



:) Max

My Father's Desk

This morning, February 21, 2006, three days after his death, I sat at Dad's desk and
computer working on calls to family friends, typing parts of the memorial mass program,
and reading emails that are already coming in with condolences for the family.
I probably would have sat there indefinitely had Marisa not called to be picked up from
school- that was probably good.
I listened to the CD that the grandchildren put together for Poppa's Prayer Service. I was playing it over and over.
I found myself looking all around Dad's desk, in the drawers, at papers on his desk and
thinking about what I might find as his last notes, what he was working on, etc.
It occurred to me that I had sat at his desk before- in this house (on 10th East), at his desk
on 3rd Avenue and at his desk in Brigham City- in his little office that he had in the
basement at the end of the laundry room (Herb's Hole)- even sitting at the library table at Grandma Blue's house in Illinois before the furniture was moved to Utah. I don't know
why but I have always been drawn to Dad's desks. From the library table in Illinois to his
desk now, I have sat in his chair and thought about him. There were always interesting
things to look at- in his drawers- little UTEP eraser, pins, magnifying glass, cards,
glasses. Dad was always working on something at his desk and we all know how much
time he spent there in his last years. It was a place of great productivity and creativity- it
was his place.
I was in awe of Dad when I was a child and I continue to be in awe of this man who
taught me so much. His calm and unconditional manner. His attentive listening. His
strength and perseverance to do things well. He was huge to me, I always wanted him to
be proud of me and to be reassured that I would always put forth my best effort
in everything that I did.
I will miss my Dad so much. I would have held on to him forever if I could have- to have
him close to me. But I realize that he was finished here, his body was done. He left
mostly completed projects at his desk, organized files and binders. He has given us so
many incredible gifts that have come from that space. The genealogy and history of our
families and his own stories from the many, many hours that he sat at his desk, working
so hard to make sure that we would be left with an understanding of our history and how
we are all connected.
I have this image of a little girl studying curiously all of the things at her father's desk- identifying with her father; thinking about him, adoring him- wanting to be just like him.

I'm sad today, too. Just realizing it was a week ago today that Dad died. I am missing him- I feel an empty place inside of me. I'm not quite there yet to feel comforted that he is "somewhere watching over me" Yesterday, Marisa was working on an assignment for school- a family tree. We started pulling out photos to use, I pulled out two of the family CD's that Dad had made and couldn't get one of them to open. I just wanted to call Dad to get help with it.
I had a dream the other night about Dad- I was trying to help him get comfortable in his bed.
A few times- I've just sat trying to think of his voice- and worrying that I'm going to forget it.
I'm relieved for his relief of his suffering- but I just miss him for my own selfish reasons.
I, too will value the time we all had together last week. When many of my friends asked what they could do- I explained that there are five kids in our family(plus our individual families) and we were really rallying to spread the tasks around - and that was really good- we were sharing everything. I am so glad for all of you.
Well, I'll post the writing that I read to you the other night-
I love all of you. Kay

Yes we are back to work, etc. I went grocery shopping on Thursday afternoon and it brought back memories of shopping with Dad when I came to visit the past ten years since that was 'his job'.

It was a special week to be with everyone, sad but full of good memories. Amazing seeing some of those people at the service on Wednesday.

So here's to Dad's last wish on the Blog - that we all contribute to it at least once every two weeks or so. Whether it is telling us about your commute to work, or a wierd person you met. Or commenting on something someone else has put on the blog, or what your kids are doing at school, or a political comment (since we know there are different views there), etc. After all, by making an effort look what happened with Warren and Dad's friendship - it lasted 60 years. And by not having efforts returned, what happened to Dad and Lois' relationship - it was barely there.

It'll be strange not ever seeing a comment from Dad here or getting an email from him, or especially hearing his cheerful voice when I would call, but I can help keep the family blog going and keep relationships going with each of you.

Love you all,
Max

Today, we arrived in Phoenix and it was 85 degrees.
Tomorrow is a cub scout picnic and Monday we jump back into school, etc.
I thought I would have a quiet day on Monday, but I had previously volunteered to help with the first grade and on Tuesday, I help with the third grade. I guess my quiet day will be Thursday.

Today I am sad. There is no task to complete, just lots of thoughts of the last week and the years I shared with Dad. Mom is gung ho with plans for her new life. I am still working on the change. There is no more Mom and Dad.

Some friends came to our house yesterday and stocked the refrigerator with food. I didn't have to deal with the grocery store tonight. I received some cards in the mail.

I am very blessed with the family I have, the husband I married. It was a special week with lots of good things to remember. I'm still working on my next step.

Maybe start the laundry.

I love you all,
Ellie

We finally got a real snow storm. The media is in full hysterics about it and the grocery store was packed with people stocking up on - well I don't know what they were stocking up on but it's customary for everyone to rush to the store when storms are predicted.

Here is the scene that greeted me as I stepped out my door this morning.

I was walking over to the Tastee Diner for breakfast but I gave up about a third of the way there when I hit the 3 foot snow drifts.

The other evening (it was dark out, but not late) I went out to see if the stars were still there. They seemed to all be in the right place and I was marveling...when I heard shots! Not just a couple of shots, either. I heard rapid firing. After telling Lynne about it we decided I should call the Sheriff's dispatch and report it. There is a herd of 30-40 deer who graze the field next to our house every night and we thought somebody could be poaching. At the very least it seems odd that somebody would be shooting like that after dark.

I called the dispatcher and she said she would send somebody out immediately. About 10 minutes later I got a call from a Sheriff's Deputy. He wanted to verify what I heard, when and where I was when I heard it. Then he said, "Yeah. That was me. I'm on the SWAT Team and I'm trying out the new assault rifle."

Apparently, his parents live down the road and he grew up here. Very nice guy. I guess I feel safe from the "terrorists" knowing that Andy and Barney are armed to the teeth.

Can't believe you still have a album of The Knack.

Happy Birthday Mom!

Looking forward to seeing everyone in Utah in only one month. It'll be short but very nice.

Love you all and have a nice weekend.

Max

Yes, you are, Ellie! and many of us are right behind you.

The boys have discovered some old albums that George and I have around. We listen to the Knack, Three Dog Night, and, oh no, the Partridge Family. Yes, we have a record player that works. It's been fun to dance around with the boys. Davis calls it "olden days."

I'M NOT OLD!

Ellie

Hello everyone:

I have been home the last two days since I had a tooth pulled yesterday morning. This is the one that has been giving me problems for 6 months - first they thought it was my TMJ acting up, then a root canal, etc. Then finally decided that it was cracked all the way through so needed to be pulled. A bit scary for me since I have been so lucky with my teeth - only 2 cavities/fillings, no braces, etc. But it was done quickly with anestetia and I'll be back to work tomorrow. It already feels better than it had been.

Life is fine here. We are having an early spring it seems - we'll see how long that lasts. We had a little party a week ago (day time on a Sunday) for Australia Day. It was actually on Thursday but we decided to have a party on our day off. After we had already planned it and sent invites out, we met a group of 6 people from Sydney who have a company in the office complex just up the street from us. So there were more Australian's as well. Some old friends we hadn't seen much since being back. Jo and Toby came down as well which was great. It was a very fun day with special Australian treats - sausage rolls, ANZAC cookies, lamingtons, cucumber and vegemite sandwiches.

That is all on our end.

Hope Megan's swim meet went well. That's great that she is doing so well.

Love to all,
Max

Hi Folks,
Very little going on here. Busy getting the 07 budget together to submit next week, but that is just the usual. The SCOTUS confirmation circus is over and we're all ready for the next circus to come to town.

Dad, the history is correct. Nothing to add.

Hi everyone-
Just a quick note- (I asked Megan to post a blog about this- but she couldn't get to it) Megan is swimming in the 3-A High School State Championships this weekend. She is swimming the 500 yd. race (how many football fields is that again, Charley?) We are hugely proud of her and all of her hard work- she's awesome! It is a great team and she's been having a great experience- team dinners, inspirational notes from the team captains and coaches. She is fully into the team spirit- everyone cheers everyone on. There is a ton of team camaderie and great sportsmanship. She will actually swim her race on Saturday evening. Duane, Marisa and I will be there to cheer her on. All of the families wear Judge t-shirts to show our support. The back of the t-shirt reads:
JUDGE MEMORIAL CATHOLIC SWIMMING
"AND WHATEVER YOU ASK IN PRAYER,
YOU WILL RECEIVE, IF YOU HAVE FAITH."
Matthew 21:22

It's so cool- Love to everyone- Kay
(I'm off to school to play in the 8th Grade vs. Faculty volleyball game and then we take the ski/snowobard program up this afternoon for our last day of the program, then back to the school gym for a apres-ski pizza party! )